Silent Voices of the Soul: The Backstory (part 4)

Trust was something I needed to learn. It didn’t come easily; there was always a process involved. But, this was an “either/or” situation. Either I trusted the truths Spirit was whispering to me, or I didn’t. Either I was channeling, or I wasn’t. There was no meeting Spirit half-way as far as this project was concerned. It was a partnership, and in order to partner with my highest self, I needed to completely trust the process.

As long as I let Spirit speak, the words flowed. Pages and pages of spiritual insights were given to me. But there were also times when channeling couldn’t happen, times when I was standing in Spirit’s way. Those were the moments when doubt, frustration, impatience…got the best of me, and if you were to look at my first journal you would be able to identify them. You would see where I had crossed out words or put question marks next to phrases that didn’t make sense at the time. You would see where the session ended, that Spirit had no choice but to stop speaking because I had stopped listening.

In those days there were more moments of doubt than there were moments of trust. My notebook was a reflection of my life.

Every channeling session was a unique experience. Spirit had a specific plan every day–a lesson that would not only show up in a notebook, but in my life as well. I would write and then Spirit would put a metaphysical spin on the words. I would say things like. “I can’t believe every store in the universe has run out of black hair color; and Spirit would say, “Maybe you need to lighten up.” I would say, I don’t understand why my client is so afraid to move forward; and Spirit would say, “Yes, you do.” “What is your biggest fear?”

It never failed; the answer was always in my question. All I needed to do was look at it from a higher place, through Spirit’s eyes. All I needed to do was be the student–ready, willing and open to learning the truth.

While I was learning how to channel, I was also learning how to go with the flow in my life. This was something I had not yet mastered, something I wanted to learn. I never thought of myself as a controlling person; I never tried to control people. But I did unknowingly control my own life. I held myself back from opportunities. I stood in my own way. I carried my childhood with me wherever I went without realizing it–years and years and years of abuse. You wouldn’t think that something that happened so long ago could still affect you. But it did. It affected me. It affected everything.

Channeling was not something I could control; it was something that just happened. And when I had become comfortable with my daily writing exercise, Spirit started to speak to me when I wasn’t holding a pen in my hand. It would happen while I was walking. It would happen while I was folding laundry. It would happen while I was making chocolate chip cookies. Spirit found me whenever I was quiet.

Some of my most profound revelations have occurred while I was doing the most ordinary, mindless things–amazing, life-changing, soul-stretching epiphanies.

I’m not exactly sure when the book started to write itself. But I know it was an extension of my journal-writing. My first notebook was filled with bits and pieces of spiritual information: definitions of spiritual concepts, eleven laws of energy (a.k.a. “The Law of Attraction”)…outlines of things that would be fleshed out over time. At one point my guides gave me an interesting collection of words and told me I would be writing a book around them. They found me in the most ordinary way; at the time I had no idea what they meant. The words? “When the Spirit Speaks”: “Silent Voices of the Soul.”

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